I know everyone has seen this story and I have nothing to add, but I have to point out that this is the greatest opening paragraph for a newspaper article I have ever read in my entire life:

A middle-aged American construction worker, on a self-proclaimed mission to help American troops, armed himself with a dagger, a pistol, a sword, Christian texts, hashish and night vision goggles and headed to the lawless tribal areas between Afghanistan and Pakistan to hunt down, single-handedly, Osama bin Laden.

The rest of the article is also incredible. Yes, he’s crazy, we don’t want to encourage this, and he would most likely have ended up as a chess piece for the Taliban, but this guy is pure American, blind, stupid, Charles Bronson ballsy-ness, and someone needs to make a movie about him. I mean you could not write a better movie poster tagline than this quote from his sister:

“I’m guessing that he wanted to do one last thing for his country before he died,”

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